uncomfortable 108pm

i feel really uncomfortable in my own skin right now. i dont know how to describe it. im laying in my bed warm and fine but my mind is everywhere. i feel like shit. i hate college right now. my roommate situation is not ideal but i have to live with her so i might as well make the best out of everything. i just dont feel like i can trust anyone, or anything that they say. i miss joe alot lately. i havent talked to him in a couple days, but he comes back one week from today for 2 days. better than nothing. one part of me is so excited to go home and get out of this place but i dont want to be around my house packing and getting ready for the move. my anxiety disorder and depression is back in full swing and im not sure how to cope with everything going on. i want to pack up and re-start everything. i am so sad and anxious, i feel like i dont have any stability in my life. and now i dont have a home. maybe ill visit renee this weekend and get out of this place without being back home. i need a drink.